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Things you want to say to employees but can't because you're professional...

Robey

Partly as a bit of fun, but mostly as an opportunity to vent...

Employee: "So what's my motivation for getting up at 5am to be on site for 7am?"

What I wanted to say: "Keeping your f-ing job? The fact that we pay you a salary far in excess of what your meagre skillset, dubious intelligence and questionable competence deserves?"

What I actually said: "Your professional pride in the delivery of an excellent service that our clients appreciate."

Parents

  • Me - Where's X gone? I haven't seen her for over an hour and a half.

    Her relative - Er....she's doing an errand for me off site. I couldn't be ar**d to fill my car up with fuel so I sent her but she is stuck in traffic.

    Me - She didn't ask/tell me????

    Her relative - (embarrassed grin)

    1. As her line manager, she should have asked/informed me if she wanted to go off site (security, H&S blah blah)
    2. It took her over 3 hours (she was on full pay)
    3. Glad I start my new role in just over a week with hopefully more professional colleagues

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  • Me - Where's X gone? I haven't seen her for over an hour and a half.

    Her relative - Er....she's doing an errand for me off site. I couldn't be ar**d to fill my car up with fuel so I sent her but she is stuck in traffic.

    Me - She didn't ask/tell me????

    Her relative - (embarrassed grin)

    1. As her line manager, she should have asked/informed me if she wanted to go off site (security, H&S blah blah)
    2. It took her over 3 hours (she was on full pay)
    3. Glad I start my new role in just over a week with hopefully more professional colleagues

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