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Things you want to say to employees but can't because you're professional...

Robey

Partly as a bit of fun, but mostly as an opportunity to vent...

Employee: "So what's my motivation for getting up at 5am to be on site for 7am?"

What I wanted to say: "Keeping your f-ing job? The fact that we pay you a salary far in excess of what your meagre skillset, dubious intelligence and questionable competence deserves?"

What I actually said: "Your professional pride in the delivery of an excellent service that our clients appreciate."

Parents
  • I had an employee complain to me last week that there was a problem with his tax and we were deducting too much. His tax had gone up from £35 to £70. That would be because we had just moved him from weekly to fortnightly pay.

    What I said was 'yes, £35 x 2 is £70 and you are now paid every 2 weeks rather than weekly'.

    What I wanted to say....we you can probably guess!
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  • I had an employee complain to me last week that there was a problem with his tax and we were deducting too much. His tax had gone up from £35 to £70. That would be because we had just moved him from weekly to fortnightly pay.

    What I said was 'yes, £35 x 2 is £70 and you are now paid every 2 weeks rather than weekly'.

    What I wanted to say....we you can probably guess!
Children
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