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Things you want to say to employees but can't because you're professional...

Robey

Partly as a bit of fun, but mostly as an opportunity to vent...

Employee: "So what's my motivation for getting up at 5am to be on site for 7am?"

What I wanted to say: "Keeping your f-ing job? The fact that we pay you a salary far in excess of what your meagre skillset, dubious intelligence and questionable competence deserves?"

What I actually said: "Your professional pride in the delivery of an excellent service that our clients appreciate."

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  • Great thread that keeps on giving!

    At a previous company we were offering a temp marketing assistant the chance to go permanent, this would be her first permanent role out of university, having done a series of temp jobs for her first year post-graduation. The temp was disappointed with the starting salary (ignoring the wide range of benefits that went with it) and said:

    "but I happen to know that X company next door has just hired a graduate for a similar role in their marketing department and they're paying her £7,000 more than you're offering me".

    Being familiar with the neighbouring company I replied: "Yes I'm aware of that, and understand she has a first class honours degree in Marketing whereas you have a 2:2 in Oceanography .... or course it is entirely up to you as to whether you wish to accept the offer or not"

    She did but I received a lot of sulky looks thereafter!
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  • Great thread that keeps on giving!

    At a previous company we were offering a temp marketing assistant the chance to go permanent, this would be her first permanent role out of university, having done a series of temp jobs for her first year post-graduation. The temp was disappointed with the starting salary (ignoring the wide range of benefits that went with it) and said:

    "but I happen to know that X company next door has just hired a graduate for a similar role in their marketing department and they're paying her £7,000 more than you're offering me".

    Being familiar with the neighbouring company I replied: "Yes I'm aware of that, and understand she has a first class honours degree in Marketing whereas you have a 2:2 in Oceanography .... or course it is entirely up to you as to whether you wish to accept the offer or not"

    She did but I received a lot of sulky looks thereafter!
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