Trans employee - making them feel welcome - General - Diversity and inclusion

2 Trans employee - making them feel welcome

31 Jul, 2024 17:43

Hi I’m still currently a student awaiting my level 3. I’m looking for advice on a new employee. When interviewed we were unsure if the person presenting to us was male or female. We offered them a job and they accepted. New starter documents were filled in as male pronouns, he/him so we left it there. When checking passport I noticed the sex was down as female. I have not asked the new starter about this as I don’t want to infringe any rights. Is there anything I should be asking or am I right in thinking that unless they inform us that they are transgender it isn’t something we should broach? I work for a fairly open-minded company so it really doesn’t matter what someone identifies as, we just want to make sure their needs are being seen to without making it obvious to other staff members.

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Robey | 0 Posts

1 Aug, 2024 06:59

First, it is OK to ask.

I assume they have a gender-neutral first name and you haven't used a diversity screening form that asked them for their gender identity or transgender status that you can refer to. So to ask them on day one, "what pronouns do you prefer?" or "what's your gender identity?" is a perfectly reasonable question.

Second, once their gender identity is established, stick to it.

Third, if you make a mistake, apologise and try to do better. I admit that I struggle with they/them pronouns when a person clearly passes as male or female and often have to correct myself and apologise. If they are non-binary, ask how they'd like to be introduced. It might be "This is Sam, they are non-binary", or "This is Sam, they use they/them pronouns" or just "This is Sam, they'll tell you more about themselves at the team meeting later".

Back in the 90s, I had two trans friends. One was transfem and quite clear about her pronouns and identity. The other was transmasc, but very unclear. I was friends with him for at least a year before we drifted apart and in that entire time I never knew his pronouns and never had a vocabulary with which to ask (I only found out he was transmasc years later from mutual friends).

We are much better equipped, these days, with the right words and vocabulary to understand how people wish to be addressed and treated, and this is a tremendous boon that we should not be afraid of making use of.
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David Perry | 0 Posts

1 Aug, 2024 08:57

Welcome to the community Amanda
"am I right in thinking that unless they inform us that they are transgender it isn’t something we should broach?"

Why, or what would you need to ask? The only issue I'd want to be concerned with is whether they complied/used the correct toilet. (I'm not woke enough to know the right score on that!!).

Like Robey someone I knew at school (in the 1960s) who about several years ago changed their sexual identity. If you know them well you can chat about most things, and If they want or need to tell you something its up to them really. Put another way, would you ask someone you'd hardly met if they'd changed gender?
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